http://heyyousaycheese.blogspot.com/2010_01_01_archive.html
I started writing a blog post early this week after a particularly lonely Sunday night. It was self-induced loneliness, brought upon by an inability to voice the truth before it was too late and I was released from my cozy company into the chilly Melbourne night. However, the more I tried to write about how confusing life was (and, ohh, isn't 'honesty' tricky and, ohh, isn't 'irony' a bitch etc), the more I started to seriously dislike myself and my ridiculously magnified problems, and considered consuming a whole bottle of red wine on an emtpy stomach just to blot out my onerous voice. Lucky for you, I never published the post (and, in case you're curious, I didn't drink the whole bottle, just a glass... maybe two). Instead, I sat staring at the keyboard with a mixture of hatred and trepidation.
This week, I was given one of those 'big decision' moments that I was hoping only happened in the movies. The more I think about what to do, the more I just want to curl up into a koala-shaped ball and burrow into a large quilt where there is nothing but labrador puppies, rainbows and macaroni & cheese. Alas, this sort of fantasy is at once unattainable and un-hygenic, so it's off the table. And, instead of dwelling on it here online, I've decided to avoid the drama and write about the things that make me really happy! Hey hey!
I'm just going to rattle off a list in no particular order at all - maybe there is something you find similar here to your own 'happy list', or maybe there is something that you already know about that I should know about too! Tell me, tell me now! Or forever shut your face.
1. The ladies and gentlemen I refer to as 'friends' and, are thus, a true, funny, loyal, supportive, enigmatic, and magical sort of human.
2.Really, really delicious chocolate. Even better when covering a strawberry.
3. My black -sequined Tesla skirt.
4. Dinner with my family - it doesn't occur that often, and when it does, I find myself staring at the small bunch (i.e. Mum, Dad, sister, sister's boyfriend) with a true sense of belonging and love.
4. Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, and cheesy 90's pop music that I can dance to like a total dag.
5. Dancing.
6. Flowers. In a field, in my room, in my hair.
7. Saying 'i love you'.
8. Hearing 'i love you'.
9. Yummy coffee, banana smoothies, spaghetti bolognese, granita, prosecco.
9. Kisses and cuddles and hand-holding with someone that makes my heart all weird-like.
10. Balloons, rain on the window, rainbows, and rabbits (particularly giant rabbits).
11. Sitting on Bondi Beach on my own, on a stormy day, listening to the ocean.
12. Planning holidays to New York, Paris, London.
13. Writing. Especially on the vintage typewriter given to me by my flatmate.
14. Reading Frankie magazine in bed with a cup of Earl Grey as my company.
15. Fairy lights in trees.
16. Jasmine trees.
17. The cucumber salad my dad makes every Christmas and the gardenias my mum collects for the day.
I'm aware that this blog is currently more like an online journal and I don't really expect anyone to take any interest in reading about my tiresome woes and meager thoughts. However, maybe - just maybe - by recognising a little bit of yourself in my words, you might feel less solitary and a little more connected to your fellow humanoids. And that's nice, right?
I suggest compiling your own list - it's quite the satisfactory night-time activity.
xx
